Liverpool Stadium Renamed As “This is Juanfield” After Manchester United Clash – Satire

In a recent development that threatens the rich, glorious history of Liverpool Football Club, the Football Justice Court has said that to laud Juan Mata’s dazzling display at Anfield, the proud and intimidating ‘This is Anfield’ poster must immediately be scrapped and replaced by a ‘This is Juanfield’ poster.

The Court’s verdict came barely 72 hours after Juan Mata tore the Liverpool defence into shreds enroute to a brace that will be spoken of for generations to come. United’s long lost free-flowing attacking football, that seemed to have been misplaced in some cupboard after Fergie’s retirement, was back for good as Mata latched on to Ander Herrera’s through ball and gave the visitors the lead with a sharp finish. The second goal was fit for the heavens. A delicate chip from substitute Angel Di Maria was beautifully finished with a bicycle kick so beautiful his teammate Ander Herrera’s immediate expression spelt utter awe at the sheer genius of it all.

Louis van Gaal was asked about how he felt about Mata being immortalized at the home ground of United’s fiercest rivals, and the Dutchman had a tongue-in-cheek comment to offer: “Mata showed his class and stamped his authority on the game, but Steven Gerrard had the most significant stamp. Liverpool needn’t lose heart. Next year is theirs.”

The man himself had to go through a torturous time at Liverpool Airport after the match as the Police detained the Spanish wizard for carrying Alberto Moreno in his pocket.

Meanwhile, in other unrelated news, in Steven Gerrard’s ‘Gone in 48 seconds cameo’, celebrity couple Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are rumored to have adopted another baby while David Beckham signed another multi-million dollar deal for stripping into his underpants.

Unconfirmed reports suggest Liverpool Post Office have decided to release special edition Steven Gerrard stamps, starting next month.┬áLast heard, Alberto Moreno was still trying to crawl his way out of Mata’s pocket.